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Monday Memories: Eating At The Table

8/3/2020

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Picture

​Canned tomatoes...


Red, large, watery...disgusting.

Mom put those in almost everything she made. It made supper not always enjoyable, but I ate. Luckily, I had something to distract me.

"Hi, girls! What y'all up to? Eatin'? You eat it all up now."

The chair scrapes out and he sits down.

"Well," he says, after filling his plate, "what'd y'all do today?"

Shouts of "I played wif my dolls!", "I drew a picture!", "I didn't get into trouble!" go 'round the table. He smiles.

"That's good. That's real good. Well, I heard a new one today."

"Drum!" my mom warns.

We all get quiet, looking at Dad out of the corner of our eyes and trying very hard not to grin.

Mom gets up to get something for Bill. Dad leans in and whispers, "Did you hear the one about the dog that walks into-"

"Drummond!" Mom yells, her head popping up from behind the refrigerator door. "No inappropriate jokes!"

"Alright, Mylin."

We sit back, but we know the funny isn't over. We eat some and the silence stretches. Mom comes back to the table and begins to feed Bill.

"This dog walks into a bar and says-"

"Drummond Atterbury stop telling these girls your jokes!"

He leans back and grins at us. And then he winks. Even as young as we are we know he's flirting with our mom and --- he's gonna tell us that joke later. It's just fun to watch them argue. And he NEVER stopped. No matter how hot and bothered she got.

He leans across the table again. "Hey, Maria," he whispers.

Mom pauses and raises an eyebrow at him.

"Come hear for a second."

Maria scoots off her chair and stops beside Dad. We are all waiting. I can barely contain my excitement, my legs are swinging back and forth like they're wiper blades on steroids.

"Pull my finger!" he tells her.

"Drummond!" Mom yells, popping up from her chair, but she is too late and a very inappropriate sound rips through the air.

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    Kara O'Neal

    An author who has too much to say is dangerous.

    The subjects on this blog:


    Monday Memories -- My Childhood

    Wednesday Words -- Books!

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    Contact: kara@karaoneal.com

    Monday Memories: Cast

    Kara -- Me
    Maria -- sister
    Wendy -- sister
    Bill -- brother

    M'Lynn -- mother
    Drummond -- father

    Grace -- mother's redheaded friend
    Liam -- Grace's husband
    Gorgeous (Georgie) -- oldest son and friend
    Phillip -- middle son and friend
    Andrew -- last child and friend

    Jo -- mother's "big idea" friend
    Noah -- Jo's husband who builds things
    Jack -- oldest son and friend
    Roxi -- middle daughter and friend
    Lela -- last child and friend

    Alex -- friend who travels the country and lives in Dallas
    Blossom -- friend who lives in Dallas and sells houses

    Miss Holly -- next door neighbor
    Kirk -- middle son
    Scotty -- youngest son

    Lou -- uncle on my dad's side who likes baseball
    Evaline -- my dad's sister who's crazy funny
    Luke -- oldest son and my cousin
    Han -- younger son and my cousin

    Clark -- my mother's brother who bleeds maroon

    Alexander -- my eldest cousin on my dad's side

    Dawn -- cousin on my dad's side that is the same age as Maria

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